I said ACK before Andy Samberg made it even remotely funny. That tool is stealing all my lines.
Yeah, you've definitely been jizzing in your pants years before he made it socially acceptable
Man, the last time I saw you you were giving me a thumbs up while being pulled out the bar by your belt from some girl.
It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
I would also like to inform you that I can no longer lay on my back because my tailbone is bruised from the nightstand. Good job.
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
Your beautifulness. Funnyness. Sexy hairness. Coolness. Plus you ask google how far wendys is from your house. Will you marry me
Yes stubble LOOKS hot but factor in his shitty bj skills and I might as well have jacked off with apricot scrub
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
I don't even know man. I was to busy having beer showered on me and grabbing some balls
We thought it was a good idea to send a picture to our HS science teacher where she's smoking a joint and I'm holding a monkey, and he invited us to lunch. NEW LEVEL UNLOCKED.
I can't. I'm not drunk enough for this information.
We hooked up for a while and on his way out he high fived me and said "stay weird"
Update: That guy is no longer in the restroom, so he's probably not dead.
She definitely peed in a bucket in their closet last night. We should warn them about that, right?
Hurry up I'm getting mooned by a hobo
We keep making plans but he keeps getting arrested. Such a tease
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