I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
If you had to guess, would you say that as a species, midgets are more or less flammable than humans?
Less. Duh. They have less combustible mass.
All I remember was the chick screaming "don't hookup with him! His dick's the size of a cucumber"
My biology professor just used the phrase "dick fairy" in a sentence. No, it didn't make more sense in context.
well as my mentor always said, "Don't antagonize the man whose penis gives you multiple orgasms."
If I'm gonna go to jail I'm gonna be wearing a poncho
After all the hair products he's stolen from me, he better fucking be gay.
I dealt with the imported moonshine, but when the cocaine came out, I had to get the fuck out of there
Sounds good. Look at us. Planning sex like proper adults.
Seriously. All I want right now is a 40 with a nipple on it, and a nap
We climaxed at the same time during ain't no mountain high enough. Does it get more cheesy or domestic for a non relationship?
Let's FaceTime each other while we shotgun beers
Ugh im hungover from last night, and to top it all off, I think someone jacked my laptop.
umm ya, so we found it in the oven wrapped in a pillow case this morning
He listens to me complain and in return I send him naked pictures. It's a win win situation
I woke up to rachel asking "did anyone else fall out of a tree last night?"
Randomize
