the the hell do you 'accidentaily" jizz on a shirt thats folded in a drawer?
Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
I wish I had more reasons to start sentences with the phrase, "Here's the thing you've got to remember about cougars ...
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
I hit a bug from across the room with my flip flop boomerang style. That awesome.
We could make it a date. Dinner and a show. The show being my nipples getting pierced.
Uh oh. Middle aged belly dancers. And they just got out swords. Shit is about to get real.
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawnmower thinking of you
You told her to step on the scale because you had whiskey goggles, and scales don't lie.
Her dad high fived me on the way out the door. Not the reaction i expected after she came so loud.
there are not enough nopes in the world for that situation.
Finally finished unpacking shit from school n found a bra with no idea whose it is... I miss college so much it hurts sometimes
Just stopped at a cross walk because the light turned red 3 streets down. I'm way too high.
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
Randomize
