Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
why do all the strippers look like they came from fraggle rock
after drinking 6 jumbo margaritas he then proceeded to tell the entire restaurant that he was going to "bust a load in me" when we got home....how do you think the rest of my night went?
flashcards smell like vodka and my textbook is in the toilet. ready for the final
literally every day that goes by where he doesn't talk to me makes me more determined to get him to have sex with me
just passed out while on hold to see if i left my debit card at the bar last night.
thank god my boss can't smell the tequila on my breathe over the phone.
It's okay, I climbed on the roof of the bar to get my shoe back. This may become a Saturday tradition. I'll keep you updated
Seriously, dude... You knows its bad when you gag on her nipple.
If I believed in "responsibility" and "having limits", I would probably say I consumed too much alcohol in the last 48 hours
I am one Jewel song away from suicide watch
Signs of a stoner: trying everything in your fridge topped with peanut butter to seek satisfaction.
Also there's a home game tomorrow and I thought about holding up a sign that says, "I madeout with #64 during orientation week" would that be inappropriate??
"You're the only girl I haven't made out with yet" = worst pick up line ever
I'm glad you don't care about kids. That's one of your better qualities.
Randomize
