I threw a jar of pickles out the window at a police car, why was that not a good enough reason to put me to bed?
thought i was the most hungover person in class until i saw a kid puke into his bookbag...he wins
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
found a cell phone. in the freezer. wrapped in bologna. explain?
We're not even buying beer. Just vodka. In pre-retrospect this was a bad idea but we're doing it anyway
Tell me you didn't have sex with my dad.
The first aid guy just told us to go get hammered...I'm taking his advice
Haha yeah that's basically it. He was like "i've always had a thing for you, and even sober i still would do and feel the same way." so glad to know i am worthy of a sober hookup as well.
I feel like it went downhill once I decided we should take $100 tequila shots.. oops lol
the problem is i have six tabs of acid in my freezer and no self control
I slept with one of the directors so you would get a good price on the ballroom for your reception. I'm the best MOH. You owe me bitch
Man i fell asleep on a random persons porch on the way home and woke up to the family banging on the windows trying to wake me up
My boobs keep hanging out of this shirt. I think thats the style I'm going for tonight
Well you know I have tits so that's half the battle
Got a blowjob while watching James Bond's "Octopussy." My 13 year old self would be so proud
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