Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
You might not want to sit on your couch. Actually you may want to throw it away. My bad.
I didn't budget in chasers this month so were chasing everything with water. Sorry.
Alright I don't know how you'll link it to me but yes I left a nearly empty 12 pack on your trunk
and yes i will spend 10 dollars on a vibrating toothbrush to masturbate but not a calculator for my test
Call me old-fashioned, but I don't think the words, "Finger my ass" should find their way into casual conversation.
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
It feels like New Years Day all over again...me trying desperately not to throw up in the backseat & mom and dad blissfully unaware in the front
just saw a guy snowshoeing to the liqour store
was it you?
...yes
I wanted to make out with that blonde just so I could deck her boyfriend and make things interesting.
At least that would be something.
Get the fuck back here. Your brother taped bottle rockets to the front of his scooter and is bombing around screaming, "Rest in peace, Goose!"
Worst way to find out I have a half sister
Currently googling hangover cures, which looks a lot like working from the perspective of my boss.
I fucked her on her ex's Yankee sheets while she was wearing an Ortiz jersey...of course she gets to meet my mother
So I was dancing on a table with these three girls and my bro. Started to makeout with one and as the song ended I asked what her name was. She said, and I quote, "Nate we hooked up two weeks ago". To which my reply was to lift my beer to bro and proclaim, "RAGE".
Randomize
