I'm home now. bring me food and boobies
Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
I just bought the big bottle of Patron. It looks small. What have I done with my life?
Succeeded.
We walked into the bar in The Flying V formation from The Mighty Ducks. We were ready.
you probably should not have drank the wine that everyone spits out. and the sad part, that was not even your low point last night
just fit an iguana in a condom...have pics
we turned his baptism video into a drinking game
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
Yeah but he's impersonating a gargoyle jumping off of everything. Including the walls.
Feel like I died but someone put me In a human microwave and I got back to life.
Last night I had sex with one of the groomsmen I was in the wedding with. In a stairwell. 13 years my senior. Thinking I should retire from the bridesmaid gig.
I just face planted on a condom wrapper in my bed...thought of you.
You're so romantic.
I just licked wine off my own thigh. I've hit a new low.
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
i made that whipped coffee shit today. took six pouches of instant espresso.
please tell me you didn’t consume six shots of espresso
:)
i can feel colors
Randomize
