Apparently I look legit enough, cause the 3 bums next to me just got kicked awake by cops, and I was allowed to stay sitting here. That's a plus, right?
I've blown a few things in my day
Its already bleeding so dont be alarmed after you bite it
i was just texting to let you know that my facebook chat is working again so you can talk to me more. please talk to me more.
you came home covered in oatmeal wearing a tutu holding a stolen wrotting pumpkin and "its a girl" balloons tied around your neck.you were whispering the lyrics to aaron carters 'aarons party'. i think the real question was what DIDNT you drink last night
Dude, I think my check liver light just came on
he urdandictionary'ed 'tease' on his phone and made me read through all the definitions. Am i really that bad?
You slept in the bed with him... with your top off.... and just made out with him....
Jerry just sent me this: IOR GHIT ALL THE BUTTIB. Go get him. Now.
bringing a ziploc bag full of Jim Beam to the movies may not have been the best idea.
My eyes feel like they're throwing up and I am the only human on campus
Just broke into a house and crawled through a window. Upside: getting laid.
Well its all fun and games until you get naked with your ex in the shower. that's NOT flirting
You know you're high when, "Why can't I steal the duck?!" Becomes a serious question.
Why is there multiple peanut butter and toasts stuck to the fridge door?
We keep making plans but he keeps getting arrested. Such a tease
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