I'm making progress with her.. She actually looked at me today and gave me a dirty look. Things are going real good.
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
I just speedwalked down the broken metro escalator while high. Basically all my worst fears combined
They seriously just ended our alcohol presentation by giving us beer cozies. I love college.
Apparently I blacked out and pissed all over the sliding glass door from the inside, as everyone watched from the outside helplessly....
Im pretty sure you told the waiter at Dennys last night to take your pants off or show a nipple.
Hey if there is a better reason to go drink then "I've been fucking robbed!" I have yet to hear one. Also, I've been fucking robbed.
also bought condoms to give away to people who look like they're about to make a bad halloween decision. I'm like a fairy.
Maybe your new years resolution should be not to fuck in Sears bathroom anymore.
I dont know. Theres no way you can be ready for the sex hurricane that will consume you.
Her idea of a bathing suit is... well.. she might not actually even know what one is. I've only ever seen her in a pool drunk and fully clothed or attempting to get into a pool but tripping over her pants which are at her ankles. Drunk.
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
What is your friends name that I hooked up with? ....I think j found his credit card under my bed
My mom just woke me up with a cowboy hat and sunglasses on. It's 7 am and she's drunk.
The bouncer said the club was at capacity we couldnt get in till ppl left all three of them pulled their tits out we got complimentary bottle service never under estimate women
Randomize
