i always forget guys have bellybuttons
Do you know how easy it would be to shoplift if I was a magician?!
Just set a new record on Need For Speed at the arcade. Had to enter Tiger Woods as the name.
She was narrarating everything she did.. like while making toast.
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
it's official, i've been high in 26 different states, and three different countries.
Me+graduation party+hammered drunk+polish horseshoes in the dark= black eye, crying, pissed, passed out in my dress... How was your weekend?
Is asking my 8-year-old brother if he will make us shot glasses in his ceramics class too far?
What happened to my knees?
You ate shit in front of the homeless people. They applauded.
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
The teenager outdrank all of us. All. Of. Us. I woke up and she was getting everyone water and fruit snacks. I give up.
She just asked me if I was going to stay the night. I responded "I know that we are upside down".
I may or may not have puked near a bear on the side of the road this morning.
I'm sorry, but the bed has won this battle. I got up, changed my shirt, combed my hair, put on some deodorant, and then looked at my bed and got back in
Life is clearly unfair. You remember Courtney has three older sisters, well they're all "make baby sister look like a four" hot. I knew I shouldn't go home with her.
Randomize
