No one appreciates an amoeba in a balloon hat.
That's what you get when you play shuffleboard drunk.
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
The nurse told me they're using the same medicine that killed michael jackson.
if i actually bought condoms for every time i had sex, i could single handedly fix the economy
Well I'm just gonna sit here naked in this chair and whatever happens happens
My vagina is depressed thinking about her future.
I guess I fell on the bar and kept trying to get back in telling the bouncer that I left my teeth at the bar. Woke up this morning with chipped tooth
Let's get really high and wear fake mustaches and try not to laugh at each other...
Having a vagina does not stop me from believeing my balls are bigger than yours.
fuck you and your stupid hot as hell face
I needed to bring way more fireball to class to match this professors intensity
The candles are lit, the magic circle is drawn, now all we need to do is get naked and see how many orgasms we can manage.
He didn't even get to the first chorus of Hotel California before he started convulsing on top of me.
I may have been bent over an elementary school lunch table a few weeks ago. Don't judge.
Randomize
