Be sure to let me know if your relationship crumbles so I can resume hitting on you
Ew, dude I just walked in on my boss masturbating in the supply room at the restaurant. He didn't see me so I quickly shut the door and pretended like it didn't happen. And then literally five minutes later he came up to me and cupped my face with his hands and told me what a great employee I was. I got a promotion but I'm fucking scarred for life. I can't stop cringing.
DUUUDE!! just found out that the fbi has a kids page. guess who's got a new jumior officer printout badge?
i wish semen tasted like chocolate
I have never made a good decision in that bathroom...
he gets drunk and then tries to eat the lasers at the dance club
lets just use each other and get past this awkward stage. forget my name.
I drank entirely too much. My skin hurts to wear
I think they were making kool-aid in my bed. There is lots of sugar and my hands and face are stained blue.
2 weeks into this dating someone with money thing and I already don't know if I can go back to the being poor life
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
THERE ARE LEGITLY 4 SEPARATE BITE MARKS ON MY DICK. WHAT. THE. FUCK.
Legitimately*
Go fuck yourself
She told me the next morning I stared at her tits for like 15 minutes with binoculars from only a few seats away.
When I found out he was circumcised I called his mother and thanked her
Sexual Dilemma - Covid Edition: Flirting with a cute frat boy. The Cougar in me wants to go back to his frat house and fuck his cocky brains out. The adult in me doesn’t want to get Covid and have to quarantine in a frat house for 2 weeks\n
Randomize
