Facebook really needs to add a bikini picture profile tab for girls, it would really save me countless amounts of time!
He made me pinky-promise that he gave me an orgasm.
you were holding her hair as she threw up saying "I'm going to be a great doctor" repeatedly.
and that's why he's hiding in the taco suit
we're making bets on your personal life
The future queen of Norway was pregnant with a druglord's baby when she met the prince. We still have hope.
She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
Please tell me nicole sent the picture of the ejaculating penis to you too, otherwise I'll feel really awkward
there was a kid getting taken out of the waterpark handcuffed to a wheelchair singing "tryna catch me ridin dirty"
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
If the cops knock on your door and ask if you saw anyone throw an orange out the window I was never there.
But he buys me breakfast and goes down on me THATS HARD TO FIND
Is it possible to hurt your vagina working out, because I think my Dumbass accomplished that... 😯😟😒😓
Do I even want to know?
You know youre getting old when you I.D. the person trying to take you home to be sure they're over 25. Help me.
Just got hit on by a 28-year old, quadraplegic, triple-cancer-survivor redneck. Now updating bucket list to meet newfound standards.
Randomize
