god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
i can now get sex on a playground off my list of things to do in life.
i'm at a party where swedish girls are dumping laundry detergent on each other because it glows in blacklight. this is awesome
Took an impromptu nap on the floor of a starbucks bathroom using my backpack as a pillow. Please tell me you have been this hungover
I left two shots of jager for you guys when you wake up from your death. Do with it as you wish
He drives a BMW. I have to fuck him. Girl Code Rule #26.
Best part? I know that the likelyhood of this turning into an intimate relationship is like 4.25%
i swear i just dislocated a hip staying still
Dont even get me started. you fell asleep in my kitchen after being cockblocked when you tried to use my roommates bedroom.
I just woke up on my neighbors floor with my boots on, but no pants. I have 3 separate taco bell receipts in my pocket.
Fall is here I will miss walking downtown in nothing but paint and pasties
I have drunkenly angered a family of raccoons. Please send help immediately.
We stood outside the room listening to them have sex and making meow noises
That's not right, is it?
I probably should have told her I was actually the drunkest one there before she let me pierce her ear
Randomize
