i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
Should I feel badly because I just bought a really hot pregnant girl a drink after I lit her cigarette?
how do I tell him nicely and in french that we can't have sex anymore because his huge penis will ruin me for other french men?
Ps I don't think it counts as being open minded if you didn't know he was missing a leg until you had already started making out.
I'm applying temporary tattoos with green beer, this is the life.
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
Does saving a line for myself for the morning so I don't seem hungover at work count as responsibility?
Adult decisions.
You almost make it sound as if getting an education to further your career is more important than beer and tacos.
thought the power was flickering out but it turns out im just blinking
I might have beaten my fastest all time record going from "I really really like this girl" to "fuck that bitch"
I've slept in a different bed every day this week. Operation Ho Ho Ho is a success!
Send me another check for the tickets. I scratched out "anal wax" and now the bank won't take it.
Don't worry dude, I've created a sex logic bomb to stop that sort of thing.
At least you got some excitement going on, you got weed and might die tonight, I'm just sitting here bored as fuck.
How do you explain to your mom that you let your friend stab you in the leg while drunk and high on coke?
Randomize
