piano lessons. No girlfriend. What's up.
Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
I'm sorry. I think I have multiple personalities. Or it was the acid. Either way. I'm sorry.
I always figured rock bottom would've involved more hookers
got extra credit for showing up to class before a holiday. it hit me 5 minutes later that she meant easter....
i feel like pizza bites are my only friend right now
She peed in the limo. She stood up and pulled up her dress and peed on the floor of the limo.
I think im gonna bang this 35 year old at a kids birthday party in the bathroom at this house while the kids open the presents.
There's a girl in the bathroom crying about something having to do with cream cheese.
This is worse then when all the pharmacists sang me happy birthday while I was buying plan b
I HAVE to find her. I've got a pretty decent pic of her footprint on my headboard. Wonder if I can get one of the podiatry majors to help?
I asked him if he wanted a pillow, and he replied "No. Batman never had pillows."
I should be in a better mood, I just went home and had a quickie on my lunch break.
I had a sandwich.
I just saw a guy walking up the stairs with his dick out his pants. I let him know, and he just looked down in shock, laughed, and continued walking up the stairs.
He may be a manwhore, but he’s a very well endowed manwhore
That’s an important feature when it comes to a manwhore
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