bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
Sometimes I stick my finger in my own ass and pretend it’s a vagina. I think it’s kinda weird. What do you think?
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
She was giving me great head...... until I asked her how much this was going to cost.... she left abruptly
he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
I just puked while everyone was releasing balloons. Im to hungover for this memoial service. Rest in peace great gramps.
The ratio of how much he pisses me off to how much sex i get just isnt working out for me
Oh, and thanks to you. I'm now stuck in the living room, held hostage, listening to my roommate's "How I discovered I was bi" story. FUCK YOU.
An there's a little girl across the bar eating Mac n cheese... #1 she won't stop looking at me. Boo bitch I'm drinking alone. #2 I'm about to tackle her ass for that Mac n cheese.
??I have an official piece of documentation saying you are banned from Las Vegas.
Weirdest sensation ever: having your penis fall asleep. It was like tiny hulk hogan was choking it out
Simple math equation: Up till 5 a.m. drinking + up at 9 a.m. for nephews birthday party = puking in the pool
No just a slight sexual miscommunication which led to a little (lot) vomiting by one party and a bruised sternum on the other party involved.
I can't even make a guess how that goes.
yeah...well...life isn't all puppies & lap dances
Let's play "Guess What I Just Found In My Vagina?"
Randomize
