so my bro's bff came over...we had an awkward "yeah we fucked and can fuck later, but let's just pretend it didn't happen in front of the family" hug.
Not good, Ive never been this late. We need to talk.
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There is no way he is gay with that hair.
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
I just used my 7th grade year book to figure out who I hooked up with last night. Being home is magical.
Your therapist is not going to think that you using your vagina as revenge is okay
It's 1 AM and there's a guy outside my house belting out Bennie and The Jets. He stops in between verses to puke. I'm joining him.
Better than road-head. Just got model-home-head. Also got a disapproving scowl of judgment from the realtor on the way out.
How am I so hungover that wearing sunglasses hurts my head?
Remember that girl from my stats. class that I ran into at the bar 2 weeks ago? She literally hasn't been to class once since I told her I sit behind her.
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
But for real though. That weed tastes like the jolly laughter of Santa Claus.
you made it your goal to puke in every planter around the union. you got most of them. im proud of you
I am pants-free in the living room. This is liberating.
Tell her that we understand the angle wasn't the best on the first video and that we forgive her.
Randomize
