Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
I was 10 minutes late leaving for lunch today because I couldn't lose a boner. It is impossible to tuck it when your shirt is tucked in...gotta quit facebook stalking hot chicks at work
i got a mint flavored condom from wellness day...im kind of tempted to taste it
I think even Ryan Seacrest is disgusted with the thought of Ryan Seacrest getting some.
i'm pretty sure i just ruined some dude's romantic riverside sunset proposal by running outside and puking in a bush.
I feel like I'm a marionette being lifted around. Four Loko.
its 4am and she invited me over to split a 'romantic bowl of frosted flakes'...really dude?...what do you think she's trying to say?...she better not be kidding about the frosted flakes though.
I had no where to run... The dumpster sounded like a good idea at the time
My bed became a clown car for his family....I'm not ready to get married
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
Im calling you paparazzi cause of all the dick pics you take of your one night stands ps loved the panoramic one!
I'm officially no longer allowed to make any of my own decisions regarding alcohol, men, or the combination of both. Thats up to you now. Do me proud.
I just opened a beer with a child's toy at a 5 year olds birthday....can you look up the next AA meeting?!!
I can barely operate my hands; what makes you think I can operate my dick
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
Randomize
