I think you should know he took my pants (buttons and zippers included) and my thong off with his mouth alone. I found my husband
all i remember is you climbed in a garbage can and said you were trashed
Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
She went into the basement and sang to my cat for three hours....she actually has a beautiful voice....
It was good I woke up with my mattress on top of me. I walked around naked the whole night as people wished my Happy Birthday.
Found her. Shes unconscious up against the room door. Her credit card is in the keycard slot
You'd be proud! I didn't lose my id this time... It got confiscated
I got to the party and found your shoes in a bag of Funyuns. You weren't even there.
That's always how I imagine things at your apartment...
Good, I'm glad you don't have some weird, skewed, clothed version of reality over here.
How can other people our age be acting like adults when I'm still taking my birth control pill with left over gin and tonic from the night before?
I woke up to a quacking alarm clock and a rando in my bed. I told him I liked his cargo shorts. Fireball is not my soulmate anymore.
Where was Alyssa when you were sniffing the bouncer?
Passed out on some guy who looked like someone from Duck Dynasty.
She may be more beautiful than I am, but I bet she hasnt pissed in as many public places as me...
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
I honestly have no desire to wear clothes around you
I have that affect on people
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