I just want to sing "highway to the danger zone" when I'm taking his pants off.
Nothing ended up happening last night because he couldn't get my overalls or fanny pack off. I woke up this morning with one strap over my overall shorts on, my fanny pack wrapped around my chest, and the baby doll still tied to my hand. Ugh white trash parties!
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
You drank almost the entire bottle of everclear and wanted to walk around. I guess your best friends sister is a cop and you wanted her to arrest you like the lil wayne song.... so sorry dude.
I believe some people would call last night an orgy.
I'm glad we're going to catch up. too bad it's over my vagina.
Whatever it's Canadian jail, it's not like Guatemala or something. It'll be nice and cushy and they'll probably throw him a big bday party with all his friends and strippers
I just haymakered a dude with my face, can we talk about ME for a second and not the guy I fought?
Some guy named spider just bought me 5 shots
She kissed me, then said "mmm your face tastes like it needs my pussy on it."
This was the first funeral I've ever attended where I had to pee behind a bush cuz someone was passed-out drunk in the locked bathroom. Steve would have been proud.
I just want to trace his tattoos with my tongue
WHY THE FUCK DOES RICKY'S BROTHER GET AN ENTIRE POT OF PASTA FOR BEING SHIRTLESS AND ALL I GET IS ARRESTED?!
he's trapped himself under a bed and is screaming at a robot dog to give him a blowjob
When he busted out the ketchup I got the hell out of there. It got really creepy really fast.
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