It is pretty awful out and I still haven't put on pants yet.
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
explain the missing patches of hair on my cat. now.
All I can tell you is you will need a rain slicker for tonight's festivities. Any clothes underneath would be highly frowned upon as well.
Its your turn to fuck our RA next time she threatens us with an underage.
Watched him slip somethin into her drink. Dragged him of his bar stool, punched him out, and told her what i saw. Bartender used some chemical to confirm presence of rophynol. Just woke up at her place
That sad moment when you flush your Molly down the toilet at the airport & watch your vacation slowly end..
Im gonna wear a random assortment of things for Halloween, guy with the most creative answer gets laid
I'm not entirely sure what happened last night, but I think I dislocated my kneecap during an epic Mario Kart battle...
Wow i don't think I've had to send this many texts apologizing for my behavior since high school...
Alcohol won't break your heart. I mean, unless it's all gone maybe
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
Valentine's Day is now to be known as Tacos and Orgasms Day.
The Easter sex puns were too abundant
Did I turn a man straight...??
Yes!
Randomize
