I am not deleting the internet history anymore, now I am going for shock value.
I'm telling people I'm celibate. It sounds cooler when it's by choice.
this is something i pride myself on being below average for
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
i'm gonna start fucking more girls with asthma. help feed my ego.
He wanted to take a picture with our pizza to show his mom that I was pretty but more importantly that he practices in "sober" activities
I seem to have forgotten that I am wearing a one piece bathing suit under my clothes
just woke up on a lounge chair wearing a durag and holding burrito wrappers in my hands
The last thing I remember is him yelling from across the room "WE FINISHED THE HANDLE!"
It was 11pm.
I'm gone to the point of literally hugging trees, partially for support, but also because I like them.
I bought a machete, tennis balls, and matches. How is this NOT going to be a great night?
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
I keep worrying the police are going to come looking for us.
For which one? Starting a fire on my porch or having sex on my porch?
I mean, I was expecting a little more coke snorting and a little less kids and cake
That guy u hooked me up with kept calling me james while were doing it...
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