Pants 0. Shit 1.
HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
Thanks again for allowing my sister to lose her virginity on your bed.
She's trying to figure out what kind of dinosaur I am... Yay codeine.
Doing lines of coke with a $100 dollar bill off a 6in x 9in photo of your childhood self really tells you where you where you've gotten in life.
The amount I want to die right now is not proportionate to the level of fun I had last night. Not fair.
He made me write my name on his wall in crayon so he'd be able to remember it in the morning
tonight were gonna drink champagne and watch girls put themselves in awkward position
Wat day did I have sex in my sleep? I just made a Dr appt for Friday and I want to talk to her about it
Pride is not for the college student young Padawan. Tequila is for the college student.
The fact that my boss lets me drink on my lunch break makes Mondays much easier.
I want you more than I want a burrito.
I'm not as filling.
You know you're an adult when you start planning your hookup a week in advance
I gave your mom a discount on her coffee, its my way to say thanks for having a son that makes me come every time
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
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