yeh she's definitely getting a ham and plan b omelette in the morning
There is something about weddings and lines being done off my ass
Sorry I tried to blow your roommate in your room. I felt more at home there.
GOING OUT OF BUSINESS: we're having a foreclosure party tonight...We'll also be raffling off a washer/dryer, microwave and a white tiger head.
Dude if our hands were ladels we could work at a soup kitchen
That would be so convenient
People said that when they tried to talk to me I answered that there was a glass around my head stopping me from answering them
I don't think everyone found it as funny as I did... Nothing says "Party's Over" like the sound of a pump action shotgun.
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
They just keep looking funny at me. No one has attempted to tell me that I don't make sense though so maybe they're all way more high than I am.
Aside from the possibility of pregnancy, I'm going to call last night a raging success.
Keywords: shitstorm, police, jail.
250 people in this lecture & my prof asks who already drank green beer this morning& is drunk right now. I WAS THE ONLY ONE TO RAISE MY HAND
I wonder if my sister will drive me around while I do bong hits in the back seat..
Dude, exfoliate your balls. you'll thank me later.
I jerked off 12 hours ago exactly. I owe it to my penis to get laid.
Randomize
