If I pass out leave the food near me so i can wake up to it
You saying I have a drinkingg problem is like saying Superman has a flying problem.
You woke up in the middle of the night and told me we won the sweepstakes, the penis sweepstakes.
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
I just want him to slap me with his dick and call it love
Your cat is quite the conversationalist after some tequila and shrooms
I'm gonna take off my shirt and spin it around my head like petey Pablo so u can find us
If we accept the love we think we deserve do we also accept the sex we think we deserve?
I honestly don't think it will ever get topped. Unless a real female cop arrests me, then fucks me. That's it.
My wife climbed on top of me, fucked my brains out, and gave me money from the ATM. I'm living the dream.
there was so much lube in my brother's closet...
You are cut off. Your giant penis and crazy awesome sex is ruining my body...
You told everybody that you were a dragon and then projectile vomited all over the kitchen.
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
This is the most exciting thing since movie theater hand jobs
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