theres a middle aged lesbian couple holding hands on the bus and a 17 or 18 year old christian girl visibly staring freaked out and audibly praying about it
We had to be out of the dorms at 730. Meeting started at 8. I woke up at 948. Drunk and covered in glitter.
Was just told that I was slipped 2 hits of acid in my in flight drink before takeoff. 8 hours to Germany wish me luck
I'm making you a bingo card for hookups of the school year 2011-12 so you can make even worse life decisions next year
The nurse gave me a funny look when I said I thought I have an std in my throat. Bet she only does it missionary too
You hid from a cop under some guy's canoe on his lawn.. It didnt work
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
Def something wrong w taking plan b with your daughters juice box
And amler is totally snoring loud as fuck sitting on the steps with her feet in a puddle of soda puke
I was wondering why are people staring at me til I realized I was bra-less with a lei around my neck
You are lucky that I'm drunk. Otherwise I would bone you into another universe
There's just no proper way to thank a man for that many consecutive orgasims.
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
People probably think I’m a fangirl bc I go to so many shows but it’s really bc I like fucking the tour manager
guess who smoked weed with their grandpa tonight. and no it wasn't me.
Randomize