I puked the same amount of times as the number of bars i went to last night
Her vagina was like a man-sized safe.
she said she missed her period, but is going to six flags... think im safe?
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
What a good family we'd make, him and I and our kids and his good dick.
If you're trying to subtly tell me that I look like Connie Chung, just stop it. I already know.
Im in a bar and I just invented a scrabble drinking game. People are cheering. It's like the universe has aligned itself.
Seriously my only wish tonight is to be at the club in a sombrero w my shirt off pouring tequila on bitches titties
I fucked some frat guy. Then I found my brother after and made him take his shirt off and then I made him tell me he loves me
At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
I mean in all honesty I would let James Franco shit on my chest. End of story
I can still taste the Jäger. I'm gonna shoot myself.
Btw I have come to the conclusion that we really need to do it in a bed. Like at least once..
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
Yes. With one-hundred percent positivity I can say yes, I do not want you covered in waffles and syrup when I come home.
Randomize
