The guy next to me is watching porn. EVERYTIME I COME TO THE LIBRARY SOME RANDOM GUY NEXT TO ME LOOKS AT PORN.
I think im in love with that girl with the googlie eyes last night. She was looking in my eyes and at my dick at the same time. we are going out again tonight.
We just made mixed drinks in the bathroom of burger king. This is sad.
I drew a venn diagram at the top of my final comparing stuff i know and stuff on the test.
its a vaginal recession for me, ill take what i can get
he said I could live with him because I'm cheaper than a dog and don't need a pet deposit. That and I don't piss on the carpet...
Some random walked into our tent, woke her up and said "Harry Potter must not go back to Hogwarts!"
Wake up, take the dog to the trails, puke in the woods. More days should start like this.
Sundays should be dedicated to Girl Scout cookies, sex, and super hero movies.
we're going to the olympic park to run the 100m yeaaaahhh
it's 3am. Nothing could possibly go wrong here.
I hope one day I make out with someone in a taco truck :(
I'm glad I inspire you to reach for the stars
Or a taco
You're the reason why I want to be a better drunk
i spent 45 minutes yellng Heather I feel so bad i wanna die and then 45 more yelling I DONT WANNT TO DIE. thats how drunk i was
Make me food? I don't want to be a science experiment. I'm dunk. Holy shit. Drunk*. Let's do science.
See I am maturing. I just got in from my DRIVE of shame......
Randomize
