Don't you send me to vm
I swear to god I'm with a high end prostitute right now and shes the most interesting person I've ever met. She just took me in to share an evening.
And as an added bonus she seems to have gotten a blood stain out of my favorite t-shirt
i just saw a foot job.
porn is incredible...
I had a fork in my beer hand and just stabbed my tongue.
i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
Captain Phil from deadliest catch died... im trying to think of a memorial fb status but "ill miss your crabs" doesnt sound right
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
she named my penis "gigantor the baby arm"
I got arrested for "public intoxication". Fuckers threw me out of the bar into public... i mean shit they have thirsty Thursdays. And I get thrown out for self serve Sundays plus a citation.
Fair enough. I'm gonna finish off half a bottle of Brunettes in the shower anf relive the good ol' days. We need a reunion
These days, you and me are swimming in dicks.
Marco
Polo
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
You don't know weird until you've had a musical wet dream about your older brother.
I mean. I just want to sit in my bed and eat bagels. What's wrong with that?
I'll screw just about anything, but I draw the line there
Randomize
