I drank it, and now my boss keeps hitting me in the face with beams of light.
Tripping at your desk probably isn't the best plan you've had.
the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
seeing an 80 year old woman puke in the bushes changes everything...
that's spring break in florida for ya
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
Apperanlty I was screaming "It's hard to swim with a broken ankle sir" and then tackled the lifeguard. The joys of blackouts
Found our threesome girl. She says I'm pretty. She doesn't know I'm pregnant. Yet. Think we can pull it off?
Climbing out Mr. Friday night's bathroom window. He thinks I'm puking. Be on state st. with the getaway car and if you could bring me a shirt and some advil that'd be dandy.
So proud. See you in five. I've got coffee.
I am almost positive I asked to milk her when I was saying my goodbyes.
Before we fucked we both mutually agreed not to tweet about it.
I can't! Its just like the night that I bathed you, I didn't tell anyone.
He sent me a blank text message. That's a booty call waiting to happen
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
i dunno, a lot of my childhood feels like a drugged up fever dream
My boobs smell like weed again. This happens way too often.
I'm really excited to meet your new dude! But we really need to find out if he's your cousin first.
Randomize