honestly, magaritas are the void men can't fill.
I thought she was mad at me, but then we did a pose off and I realized we're friends for life
drunk...on the white house tour...security is staring. this will not end well.
the ladder is at the bottom of the pool
I didn't plan on sleeping with him until he told me his mom is deaf.. Then I felt bad.
Yeah he's definitely gonna feel that one when he wakes up. I beat the shit out of him with that broom handle.
I want to break up with him.....but he has a george forman grill...like I need that
Repeat. Dildo on the ceiling, confiscated potato shooter, and bottle of yegger. Repeat. Ceiling dildo and yegger.
I forgot I did whipits. Probably because my brain cells were killed from the whipits
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
I'm not gonna lie. I'm a little scared.
Good. The Jell-O shots look great.
As I was about to fuck him, he requested a moment of silence for Leonard Nimoy.
You were supposed to catch herpes, not feelings!!!
i think it’s okay to see him. you just can’t wind up with his penis in your mouth again
The neighborhood cougar just purred at me while I was doing yard work. I’m terrified and tumescent
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