Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
the jolly green giant just puched the pope. halloween is the best.
Seriously.......what do you have to do to get arrested in Vegas???
found your viking helmet in the parking lot this morning, its missing a horn. There was still liquor in the remaining horn. shots from a viking helmet should be mandatory.
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
I went to a bar in my pajamas last night. I'll be there again tonight in a wolf costume.
She just kept introducing me to people by telling them which of their friends I've fucked
Not sure I just ate a really big pot brownie, I feel like my future is uncertain
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
Ok here's the state of the situation: We're alone in a strange city with strange people with nothing but alcohol and sprite, I think we're gonna make it.
You forgot the part where I played Slip and Slide with my own puke and fucked up my knee.
I gave him a blowjob to kill bill. 2 of my favorite things.
Congrats on dating a convict, there's no fitbit badge for that one.
How I know I would be an awful mother....I just stirred the bong up with a baby fork. A literal baby fork....
Real life skills section of my resume: blow jobs, food knowledge trivia, sarcasm, mascaera application, sexting, tolerance of rail liquors
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