look to my right... shes dancing like she's playing dance dance revolution and her character is a retarded, drunken moose
His shopping cart was nothing but malt liquor and zucchini.
I want to punch and suck your dick at the same time. I don't think we have the healthiest of relationships.
Drunkenly auctioned off my bed for 3 tequila shots
My broken door handle makes it really inconvient for when i need to puke at red lights.
You distracted them by dancing on the stripper pole, I ripped the flag off the wall, stuffed it in my pants and we were out.
I'm just high and in my robe and I would suck a dick for some pizza rolls. I can't talk about your problems right now
apparently it's a turnoff if you ask a guy why he thinks he needs to use magnums
They put paint on their hands and tried to see how many times they could touch me before I woke up.
Judging by this purple one they got to second base.
I'm not gonna lie. The thing I miss the most about him right now is the air conditioned hotel rooms.
I was hooking up with him and then someone banged on the door and shouted "When you get the chance, will you put the weed on the veranda?"
It would be magical, all 2 min of it.
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
(440): please tell me you didn't have sex in my dress.. IT'S A VIRGIN DRESS.
On a scale of 1 to i should hide, how deep did i dig my grave?
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