we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
drug dealer added me on facebook, win ?
omg no way im finding him!
he has no pics of his face, and im always drunk so i cant remember if hes cute or not, but he told me im in his phone as "party girl" which is fitting i guess cause im dragging my hungover ass to buy preggo tests, and i had to get the cheap ones cause i blew all my cash on coke.
Note to self. Condoms are not microwavable.
Let me guess--your parents are cousins.
there was a party in your bed and you weren't invited... change your sheets
grilled cheese. we just shotgunned grilled cheese.
Just woke up to my stoned boyfriend building a shrine around my bare ass. He'll never leave me.
Well, there goes the no drunk sex injuries resolution.
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
Just got that "I know what's going on with your vagina" look from that CVS cashier.
You bought MORE?!
Woke up in her bed this morning with a half used condom stuck to the side of my face
How can a condom be "half used"?
Ran into his sister at the gym and hit it in the parking lot. I dont even feel like a bad friend she got a boob job and lost 20 lbs its not even the same sister
How does one un superglue their foot to the floor
I just lectured my ex boyfriend on how to eat a girl out what has my life come to
Broke my ankle and blacked out on my scooter last night. 'Twas grand.
Randomize
