Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
haha you were so trashed that you deleted all of your christian music from itunes and kept saying"c-ya God, nice knowin ya"
he had two deer mounted on his dorm room wall with panties and bras hanging from the antlers... i cant believe i contributed to bambi's headgear...
At this point do you think buying mom a pot plant would be funny or highly inappropriate?
We lived together for a year and neither of us knew we were both gay.
I don't remember much of last night. But I woke up with very apologetic texts from him this morning so apparently I didn't get laid. Which is stupid.
Part of me was thinking I should go old school and get a chasity belt before the semester starts. Really lock that shit down. But then I thought, fuck that. I'm going to hit that campus like an f5 whorenado
Hot Italian guy literally came into my logic class just to get my number to study with me and left. America.
My kid just put flowers in my hair to make me pretty, then showed my boobs to an entire playground. He's either the best wingman or the worst.
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
I need my daily rules like rule one don't put your dick in the vacuum cleaner
Drunk me just want to text sober me for saving that half rack of ribs I loves you
Need advice bro. Which one should I take: the blonde devil crying in the corner or the brunette crawling on the floor acting like a dinosaur??
I know! It's like he knows when my vagina wants to misbehave!
Best single mom victory - getting eaten out in my dodge caravan in the hospital parkade at midnight.Three words: screaming multiple orgasms.
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