it wasn't lemon gatorade
I just bought Christian paraphenilia at Borders for my dad's bday. I had the urge to tell them it wasn't mine, like I was buying laxatives or a dildo
Hahahaha. You probably would have been more comfortable buying either of those than what you just bought
If I die tonight, I want you to know that your sister is awesome in bed
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
Ive waited a long time for a girl with prescriptions like yours.
I told you he wasn't attractive.
Do you think I cared? I was wiping myself with a scarf..
Plan B, arranged marriage to a rich Indian, is rapidly becoming Plan A. Fuck Finals.
Sometimes I feel like I should become a beautician purely for my ability to shave pretty shapes into my pubic hair.
Why is my vagina being sacrificed for yours? I'm sure he would take a piece of you too. Your turn.
She said if her future children dont have blue eyes she wont love them
You guys had reggaeton music playing while dry humping? Definition of romance.
You walked up to a random girl on the street and asked her for a bite of her pizza...
alcohol and riverdancing are a dangerous mix. have a spraind ankle. i die now
It's five in the morning. wtf?
So...I maybe walked across campus last night with my life size Joe Biden cut out.
Randomize
