I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
so i'm sitting in his room drinking tequila from the bottle and watching harry potter. he's jacking off to some porn a couple feet away from me. at one point i look over and see that he's watching me instead of the porn. please help me figure out how warped it is that i found that romantic
i guess i called my mom last night. she wasnt nearly as impressed with what we did in the bathroom as i was
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
I want to give my boyfriend great head for his birthday...can i practice on you?
September 16th, captains log. I awoke in a daze, not sure of my location
Needing to keep one leg on the floor during sex so you dont spin should qualify for some kind of drunk award.
College is the ONLY place where you can pass off morning sickness as being hungover. I'm currently pouring beer in a spray bottle so I can spray it on myself and smell drunk.
It was pathetic and I was covered in butter
How do you say "get out of my apartment" in Spanish. No time to explain, just tell me.
So some sort of safe sex group just flash mobbed the bar by putting condoms over people's beers.
They left screaming as a hale of lubbed up condoms rained into their hair.
We have a pile of chopped wood here that suggests we may have chopped down a tree of some sort.
I wouldn't even cut tickets or put ppl in jail I'd just hand out punches to the mouth and Liam Neeson throat chops
being single and having a boyfriend 300 miles away is eerily similar. never skipped a beat eating hot wings in my bed with no pants or masturbating every day.
You asked me if I ever met a talking rock and when I said no, you looked me dead in the eye and said today was my lucky day then you crawled into a ball and started talking...that high.
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