i was so high it looked like the chipmunks movements were coordinated to that lady gaga song
He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
the jolly green giant just puched the pope. halloween is the best.
He came and then made the Jim Halpert face. does that say disappointment or what
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
I'm going to shower the piss off me now. I feel like I was in an R. Kelly dream.
Nothing like being buzzed at 10:20am off wine shots in Amish country
Emoji's do wonders when you actually have nothing at all to say..
I've had to do a couple req orders today and I would like to submit to you an order form to requisition DAT ASS
Why does my nose taste spicy?
How do you know what your nose tastes like?
the fact that I've been his fuck buddy for a year, and I'm pregnant isn't bothering me. the fact that he didn't tell me about his girlfriend does.
I was pretty sure he wouldn't be into me after I fucked his brother, and then his best friend, and yet, here I am doing lines off his stomach
Perfect attendance and not being drunk since Sunday. This is a new leaf if I've ever seen one
I’d clean the kitchen before making food. Mark “rang in the New Year” with some rando in there last night
Randomize
