During sex she told me I could do anything I wanted to her. You remember that toy lightsaber we bought at Wal Mart?
I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
I queefed so loud it echoed.
Would it be cruel if i sold xanax instead of adderall to freshman unfamiliar to the drug-taking profession?
They refer to his house as "the abortion clinic". Cant wait.
oh yea it is. i was not expecting to look at a snowbank and just see flying mushrooms
I'm cleaning my bathroom. That being said I found a klonopin and dropped it and stepped on it. Floor is clean im gonna snort it.
She swung at the pinata with crutches
This chic sharing the cab with me just started givin me head. I'll be an extra 5 minutes.
Somehow I've got the party rigged to where I get a foot massage every time someone wants a beer out of the fridge. Hellz yeah
I think it would be reallllly cool if you took your best friend to work so she doesnt have to have an awkward cab ride with the driver she drunkenly made out with last night ...
Drunk yet?
Well I just did the worm on an empty dance floor while the bridesmaids were serving cake. You tell me.
HE LIVES IN ANOTHER STATE
actually scratch that last text, he's the perfect boyfriend. He stays faithful and doesnt find out about all the guys here. it's a win-win
I haven’t sent any nudes yet in 2018.
That’s not true...is it?
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
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