oh jesus shes a lukewarm mess
I owe all of my success to double stuf oreos and weed.
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
Dude she has a fucking rock collection. Never will I ever talk to her again.
He offered but I said no. I didn't think it'd be cool to accept cupcakes in the mens room of a gentlemans club.
just spent $80 on an im sorry breakfast from mcdonalds for everyone sleeping in my apartment for being a drunkass and locking everyone out of the apartment at 2am.
yep. it's official. for $40 they will let you lick the stripper pole.
It's a bathroom floor kind of morning.
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
We broke up in downtown Nashville with drunken, blow up penis waving bachelorette parties walking by. For some reason I can see this ending up as a country music video.
I fucking give up. OKC is where small penises go to disappoint me.
the first cop to show up was this girl who hooked up with our home ec teacher in high school, she knows about questionable decisions
He asked me if I've ever had my ass ate and there was no polite way to say yeah your brother's pretty in to that 😂 I went with "no"
my one night stand just gave me money "to buy a better vibrator" tis the season
I'm fine. Heading home now...crying. Michael Bolton totally understands me!
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