just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
It's just like the Real World with babies
So i'm in a museum and theres a punch bowl from 1765 with a picture of 3 men forcing the 4th to drink the punch bowl. Colonial hazing
she keeps giving me cups of everbeer.. its everclear and beer mixed. i guess its blackout or backout time
Pizza toast. It's like pizza but on toast. BC we are broke. OMG its so good.
You would never do this sober.
We can't tell anyone we fucked because I'm still trying to get with your friend. Is she coming next weekend?
We're doing a team debriefing of Saturday night in group text right now. As 75% of the female presence at that party we saw some shit.
Need to find a Santa hat to fit my penis, he deserves to be festive too.
if my uterus stops caving in on itself long enough for me to be alive I'm there
CAPS.LOCK.AND.SPACEBAR.ARE.BROKEN.
Things he has managed to cum on so far on spring break: my bikini, my back-up bikini, three of my four bras, two pairs of panties, four beds, six chairs, the floor of several hotel rooms, the window/door to the balcony from both sides, my tits, my face, my stomach, his stomach, my ass, his best friend's girlfriend's face, and his best friend's dick.
Just FYI spring break is over and you're supposed to be back in class but hey sounds like you had your orgy so congrats.
I miss my bedroom and my bed and being able to spray myself with my choice of 15 different perfumes so I don't have to wake up to the smell of my past sins
Dude, exfoliate your balls. you'll thank me later.
reminiscing on last night: why the fuck did I feel the need to stand on chairs everytime we took a jello shot?
Randomize
