then he goes, "ok, i have to go talk to the girl i'm semi-talking to/dating and see if i'm in trouble" WHAT IS MY LIFE?!
My mom caught just caught me jerking off...in her room.
i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
About to do something stupid. You'll be my call. Bring bail money.
The woman exiting the men's room tried convincing me she was actually a good-looking man.
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
Going to the beach. Greeting Sandy with a blunt. Wish us luck!
Laying in bed nude eating a Big Mac with a cat. It's gonna be a good year.
That moment when your fucking in an airport bathroom and forget to lock the door. That poor man...scarred forever...
Dude of course I want to. Your penis is beautiful.
conclusion from last night: i should wear boob glitter more often
It was great. He never spoke.
That's not why it was great, just that's all I remember.
when I found u, u were using a t-shirt for pants
Where are you guys?
Drunk
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