gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
just the thought makes me want to clean my vag with a clorox wipe
Do NOT cum in me, on me, or in my bed.
My BOSS just pulled out a box of Christmas stuff labeled reefs.
His housemate was playing a sad violin solo for me on my way out. God I hate musicians.
her bf's celebrating 10 yrs of service at kfc...it's safe to say all the good men are taken
No. Do you know how much this carpet cost? If she comes over, you put down towels this time. i'm so not kidding.
His thanks his mom for not having an abortion at his wedding toast. I love frat weddings.
Don't ask me how, but I have a squirrel in my backpack and I don't know what to do with it.
I WILL BE THE BEST FICTITIONAL HISTORICAL FIGURE FOR THE FEMENIST MOVEMENT THE WORLD HAS EVER SEEN
I was grinding on him when mosquitoes starting biting us and ruined every damn thing. I just wanted to fuck on a slide under the stars. It's every girls dream.
Life update - currently drunk off my ass in the yoga room of SFO at 5:30 in the morning.
Immediately after sex he layed on the floor and acted like my yellow bra was pac man
if anyone breaks out the olive oil & slip n slide, text me 911.
I STUDIED GEOGRAPHY I KNOW THIS SHIT!! DON'T YOU DARE QUESTION MY AUTHORITY ON GLACIAL DEPOSITION AGAIN BITCH!!
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