we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
i'm telling everyone you had sex with a puerto rican drug lord
Walk of shame... his parents made me go to church with them first. in my club top sweat pants and slippers. i just slapped god in the face
I feel like after all he sees, the dog needs to get baptized.
you just kept saying 'take out my tanks' and tell the cab driver to go slower, i have no idea what you were talking about but i'm glad you had fun.
Just charged fat mistake $3 for a beer.
Found your pants. They were stuffed in the tank of the toilet.
Im just a social blackout drinker.
And I feel bad.
Because we're having a serious discussion about our sex life and you're playing minecraft?
I was about to attempt a citizen's arrest on my RA
We both got free alcohol and got laid by foreign men last night.
I'm not going out again for the rest of my life. I can't top this.
Sorry about the weird guinea pigs text. I was drunk and they were freaking me out
I wore home his HoHoHo boxers. I've never felt such a connection to an article of clothing.
I mentioned the porn thing he mentioned a brother it all kinda just came together
It just makes sense. It's like I end a relationship, and wash myself of sin... with tequila.
Randomize
