time to smoke my breakfast
Well It's time to grow up anyways, right? Now that you're graduated and have a job you can't drink uncontrollably
No. Now that I'm graduated I can drink uncontrollably at nicer bars
drunk old tina is grateful for 14 yr old tina for placing glow-in-the-dark stickers on my light switch...just avoided so many injuries
I hope you dream of an avalanche of penises
cocks speak louder than words, as they say
Nobody says that.
She crossed her eyes and threw up into a glass while sitting at the bar. It was fifty shades of sketchy dude.
There is an alarming amount of urine in here.
You left me a voice message at 5 a.m. It was mostly incoherent noise, you screaming my name and then something about a man with two butt holes...
don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom
do you think our homemade porn will pass for my cinematography final?
Honestly you'd think more guys would be happy to date a cute female dealer, but apparently something about safety or whatever
It's a sad night when one of your friend texts you that she's going on a date with someone you know and then invites you to maybe have a drink after
So...I maybe walked across campus last night with my life size Joe Biden cut out.
We played 2 very competitive games of Jenga and then fucked our brains out... BEST. RELATIONSHIP. EVER.
OMG OMG OMG!!!! I made his penis bleed!! I repeat I MADE HIS PENIS BLEED!!!!
Randomize
