Do you think if I drink bleach they will let me leave work?
so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
Don't really want to talk about it. You were right. She had a whole jar of toenail clippings on her nightstand that she chews on "when her fingernails are too short." Direct quote.
Just found two Xanax on the floor at the tanning bed. And yes, Im taking them...looks like going to get cancer is paying off
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
Listening to Joy Division and applying for Walmart. You get to choose which one is more depressing.
If a young child walked up to you and grabbed your penis, you'd feel violated too.
Kayla got stiches in her face. Rode in an ambulance shotgun. Tried to steal a baby, thought it was mine
merry christmas to all and to all I give the mystery rash.
I found your wallet in my underwear drawer......... Don't worry I don't plan on asking any questions
well. can officially check "get caught having sex on the front porch by the neighbors" off the bucket list.
There is a video on my phone of me suckling a bag of wine from your crotch area while you say "The Body of Christ" in a Michigan accent. I vaguely remember being offended by this yet I did it anyway.
He got the life proof phone case so he could jack off in the shower without his wife knowing
So you realized he wasn't actually cheating on you and now you're trying to unfuck things. Or in this case unfuck Tom.
Randomize
