this girl literally referred to her butthole as her "back pussy"
he was dropping me off and i told him i had to go to the bathroom and i leaned into kiss him and he asked how i went to the bathroom with a tampon up there... he was amazed that their was a third hole...and wanted me to show him where it was
when my professor asked "does anyone know what streches across south america" and a kid in the back row said "my exgirfriends vagina" i knew i was at home.
Let's review the facts-we're bored, we have a ton of beer, and we live 5 minutes from the zoo. This equation is easily solvable
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
He held me the entire night. Not endearing kind of way. Like kidnapping or held hostage kind of way.
My pants are like a grocery bag containing ONLY jelly beans right now.
That tingly feeling you're experiencing in your lady parts is my mustache. All the ladies of America are waking up feeling the same thing. You're welcome.
Giving the guy pizza was a good idea. Leaving him naked on the pool table makes you my hero
It's okay, big boobs are better than running.
It's time you knew: I have been dating your probation officer for 7 months. Pretty certain he's THE ONE. So, thanks for being a criminal.
The only thing I want for my birthday is a divorce from you.
You some how ended up sleeping on one of the beams that run along the ceiling of your house
so i might have slept on your bathroom floor last night...
Let’s not dwell on the negatives. I have a fat ass and suck dick well.
Randomize
