Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
I think taking a nice shit is a lot more satisfying than an orgasm. This is probably why I'm single.
just saw a girl with a lower back tattoo of the boondock saints prayer.. i will marry her
He ate me out and then left in a hurry and shouted "Sorry to dine and dash" as he left my house
his mom and i are swapping prescript pills..totally mother in law material.
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
I'd really appreciate it if we could dress up as pilgrims and indians for the thanksgiving eve bar crawl
They thought "watering it down" meant adding more vodka
will you please explain to me as to why or how i have a dirtbike tread looking bruise on my back?
You were Q-tipping mashed potatoes out of your ear.
Everybody knows the last week of summer internships include showing up to the office hammered and hitting on the CEO
Dude. When are you coming home? I'm laying in bed watching the Grinch and trying to pet a cat that I'm not even sure exists.
Caleb has a beard comb now. Also I have a pube comb now too. May or may not be related incidents
You need to be on (or possibly create) the international emoji committee to address all of these glaring oversights
As much as my throat was opened up this weekend, you'd think I wouldn't nearly choke on a damn almond.
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