You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
just jacked off with my ROTC uniform on. boy i feel like an american.
So I put about 15 worms in the cuervo bottle. I don't think that's how it works but I feel like hallucinating by 11am
You were spitting chewed up pretzle into my hands telling me to hold it for you.
Is it sad that I just used my electrical knowledge to not only fix but improve my vibrator?
So I just did the math and everything in this room except the computer and my clothes has been in my vagina
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
Between the puerto rican elf, the fat marine, the deaf guy and the ex coke head I've got a good preview if the men in this city...
come home. i made deep-fried hotdogs; don't let me die alone.
If someone told me one person in the department was secretly a death eater, I would suspect her, no contest.
I gave him blue balls & ate the last slice of pie so the chances of a second date are slim...
I got St Patrick's Day drunk on Friday and apparently ordered a Total Gym in the middle of the night
Guy just walked in with a 40 and a Honda steering wheel. Where the fuck am I?
You tried to chase every shot with a blueberry.
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