I hid 4 bags of cocaine in your house. Have fun finding them
Some girl just asked us for directions back to campus. we told her to take the first four lefts. We live on a block. she believed us
Game over. He has a paternity test request on his table.
Also you were throwing your phone yelling this is durable as shit
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
So i do have strep. My apologies to the british guy from this weekend. You now have one more reason to hate america
I have to stop drunkenly making out with guys just because they're tall or have a beard.
Dude I am not desperate enough to pay my dealer in change. Maybe tomorrow.
So I found a skull ring inside me this morning. I'm assuming its yours, so I'll leave it in my mailbox for you - it looks expensive.
YOU GAVE HIM A BLOWJOB ON YOUR DOORSTEP?!
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
In that case, if you come anywhere near my house you can expect to be chased down various streets by a half naked me wielding a baseball bat. No, I am not giving you my address.
Why so serious bruh
He isn't understanding any of my Fetty Wap references. He may not be a keeper after all.
You stumbled in the door as high as a kite, & ran into the table. I asked you if you were all right. You replied with "I don't have any soup."
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
Randomize