the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
just a forewarning-if you come home and hang out with your stupid girlfriend the entire time that you are here/fail to get wasted with us i will wish either death upon you or that you truly do turn gay when you return to the navy.
i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
We met on a dual walk of shame. It has to be love, we can't let that go to waste. I want to tell our children that story.
The sun is so bright. Whhyyyyy. EYES ARE DEAD.
He doesn't have any game.. I mean, his one move is forwarding chicks pictures of his penis.
He fucked a girl named Oreo... He deserved syphilis.
Smoked a topless bowl this morning. For International Women's Day. Quite liberating.
I passed out with my wizard stick taped to my hands and got woken up being poked with a St. Bernard
Drank a beer through my butt, how's your initiation going?
Shirtless guy staggering down the sidewalk, puking into a Prada shopping bag. Ahhh, the walk of shame in Boystown.
Nothing is working I'm going to die alone and on hold with a State Farm representative
My boss brought her husband's telescope to work, so all of us that work in the MMJ Dispensary got high and had an impromptu Blood Moon viewing party. I love my job.
How's work going?
Boring. I have a cat on a leash right now
I’m going to bedazzle that dick
What does that even mean
No idea, but I guarantee he’ll get hard every time he remembers it
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